Several months ago a younger relative of mine, Wiley Kimbrough, was sore after returning from a hiking adventure that lasted several days. His mother, LeSan, said he was “all stoved up.” That phrase is one of the dying expressions which are fading from conversation.

Being stoved up probably has no connection to stove pipes, but it reminds me of a story my cousin, Rooney Bowen, told me long ago. He got the first-hand account from Mr. Buford Carr, who owned Vienna Hardware Company.

Mr. Buford said a stranger came into the store and asked to buy a half joint of stove pipe. Despite the unusual request, he walked to a workbench in the back and began sawing through the short pipe with a hacksaw. An employee’s bewildered look caused Mr. Buford to vent his frustration. “Some s.o.b. up front wants to buy a half joint of stove pipe!” he said, before noticing the man was standing behind him. “And this fine gentleman,” he added, “wants to buy the other half.” 

Another dying expression is, “till the cows come home.” It was a popular saying in the days when the countryside was dotted with small farms and most of them had a few cows.   

Daddy called our small herd to the barn with a word that sounded like ‘Ho-ick.” He’d emphasize the first syllable as in “Hoooooo-ick.” After a few beckoning shouts, Star, his beloved milk cow, would lead the others up the lane.

I don’t know if hoick was a common term or not. A Valdosta friend, Eddie Hightower, said his aunt called their cows with a similar sounding “Ho-ey.” If anyone is familiar with the origin of  cow-calling words I’d like to know more. Such mysteries sometime keep me awake at night. 

“There’s more than one way to skin a cat,” used to be in the regular lineup of expressions. I’ve never understood why anyone would want to skin a cat. Maybe it refers to catfish.

I skinned a few catfish growing up, first nailing their head to a fence post like Daddy taught me. He’d cut the skin just below the head and pull it off with pliers. That process is not patented so you’re welcome to use it. 

“He’d rather climb a tree and tell a lie than stand on the ground and tell the truth.” A family friend made that comment to me years ago about a young fellow who was working for him. That expression was mostly grounded when kids stopped climbing trees. 

During my childhood we climbed trees for entertainment, but also for economic benefits. Jimmy and I would scale the pecan trees in our yard then kick the limbs so the nuts would fall. It’s not as efficient as a mechanical shaker but the price was right and the thrill was free.

Once upon a time I could climb trees till the cows came home. Now it would leave me all stoved up. And I guess kicking those pecan limbs to shake the nuts loose proves at least one dying expression is true. There’s more than one way to skin a cat.